Friday, April 30, 2010

Linguistic Nonsense

The Daily D’s opinion page is hit or miss. Some days I’ll read a well thought out, eloquent piece. The past two days do not fall into that category.

Amusing Line in Today's D

I stumbled across this line in an article about prospies deciding on college.

For some students, interest in Dartmouth came only after they had submitted their application. Leightling said he decided to apply to the College after examining the application, and chose to attend after he completed further research.

“To be completely honest, Dartmouth wasn’t on my radar at all,” he said. “[I applied because] their supplement looked relatively short, and also because my aunt told me it’s a great school.”

From my experience, that actually describes what happened to a lot of students I know.

Photoshop Friday: Moose on Mass Row

Dartmouth's more credulous students have been circulating the following picture with great excitement:

One thing about the picture is true, however: it is a beautiful day in Hanover.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

HuffPo Ranks New York Among Worst Cities for Grads

For those '10s who are soon to trade in life at Dartmouth for a spot in New York, the Huffington Post has some bad news: the City's slowed job growth and high cost of living makes it one of the least attractive places for a recent college graduate to land. Of course, this is all superfluous for the newly minted denizens of Wall Street, who will undoubtedly be doing just fine. Nevertheless, HuffPo ranks New York right up there with Detroit, Cleveland, and St. Louis.

The best cities, according to this ranking? Atlanta, Pittsburgh, Austin, Denver, and Minneapolis.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Stimulus Funds Electronic Class Attendance Sensors

In a remarkable synergy between the infantilization of college life and federal fiscal frivolity, officials at Northern Arizona University (NAU) have announced that they are using federal stimulus funds to install electronic attendance sensors in large lecture classrooms, according to the Chronicle of Higher Ed.

Campus administrators at NAU seem to have mastered the art of tackling the obvious:

Karen Pugliesi, vice provost for academic affairs, says the project will help improve attendance, which is key to higher academic performance.

Research, she says, shows a real link between good attendance and student achievement. She says the system will improve student engagement and participation, putting more students on track to graduate.

"We want every one of our students that enrolls in a class to realize their potential and be successful in the completion of that course," she says. "It's not in the student's interest for them to drop out of a course or to fail a course."

What's up with Arizona's obsession with tracking people?

Penn Football Captain Dead

Owen Thomas, Penn '11, was found dead in an apparent suicide, according to the AP, Philadelphia Inquirer, and various outlets.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Ridiculous Compensation

$28 per hour. That's the going rate for trash pick-up at Dartmouth, at least according to a bill that Facilities Operations recently dumped in my inbox for a trash pick-up at Beta, where I'm treasurer.

Now, of course, every one is entitled to the fruits of his labor. But, $28 an hour for trash pickup seems pretty excessive. If you build that into a 40-hour week, you're looking at almost $60,000 per year. Is it thus really any wonder why Dartmouth spends approximately $100,000 per student per year? When trash pick-up costs $28 an hour, it becomes much harder to scrounge together the money for professors and libraries.

By the way, for comparison's sake, the market value of weekly trash pick-up in Arizona is apparently $15 per month, or about $3.25 per pick-up. Beta was assessed $39.50 altogether for a single pick-up ($24.50 for use of the truck for half an hour, and $14 for half an hour's labor). Ridiculous.

Your Parents Were Right

Remember when you were a kid how you always wanted to watch those violent and/or steamy movies because they were "so cool!" and had good trailers with lots of Hindenburg sized fireballs, but your parents wouldn't let you see them?

Well, according to some new research from our very own Medical School, your parental units' over protectiveness has probably kept you from getting Good Sammed. Apparently, delaying when one begins watching R-rated movies can significantly delay when one begins drinking alcohol. In other words, two pediatricians have found a link between Die Hard and drinking hard.

Monday, April 26, 2010

WSJ Launches Metro Section

Today marks the beginning of a new era in New York newspapers, or so Rupert Murdoch would have you believe.

After buying the Wall Street Journal three years ago, Murdoch made it his goal to destroy the New York Times. The first real shots in his war were fired today with the debut of the Journal's Greater New York section.

So will the new section be enough to peel away the affluent readers whom Murdoch craves and needs? Only time will tell, but the first iteration is certainly promising. Good features on the art world and other upscale New York issues - rats on the UES, a $28 Million Tribeca penthouse - and on lower brow items like the optimal MetroCard swipe technique.

It is, of course, much too early to deem the move a success or a failure, but it is worth noting that The Times is not taking the threat lightly. A particularly defensive ad ran on local New York television stations, as well.

So, if you're in the Metropolitan area, check it out. It might just be worth it.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Something worth reading in The New York Times' Sunday Opinion Section

No, that headline is not a joke. If you can look past the drivel from Frank Rich's column and find your way to the back page of the Sunday opinion section you may be pleasantly surprised to encounter something worth your time.

The piece in question is a take on America's greatest literary celebrity, at least according to Mr. Tom Wolfe: Mark Twain.

Save yourself the time of flipping through the paper and go directly to the back page.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

New Coach for Dartmouth Basketball

Today, Paul Cormier was hired as the new coach for Dartmouth Basketball. The past twelve years he's been in the NBA as an assistant coach and an advanced scout. The fourteen years prior to this, he was the head men's basketball coach at Dartmouth College and Fairfield University. He was the most successful Dartmouth basketball coach in the past fifty years and his return is now official. In the words of UCONN Coach Jim Calhoun, "Paul Cormier's hiring is an absolute home run for Dartmouth. He has an incredible basketball IQ and there is no person that would fit better for Dartmouth. The game of college basketball is better today because of his hiring."

Tuesday, April 20, 2010


Pres: Eric Tanner

Vice Pres: Brandon Aiono

2011 Class Council President: Joseph Coleman

2011 Class Council Vice President: Nadine Moezinia

2013 Class Council President: Georgia Travers

2013 Class Council Vice President: Reilly Bertasi

Committee on Standards:
Nazar Alexander
Laura Kier
William Mergner III
Sara Katherine Paxton
Max Yoeli
Dennis Zeveloff

Green Key Society:
Nazar A. Alexander
Reba P. Gillis
Yueyue Guo
Kamisha K. Hyde
Rebecca M. Lee
Emilyn J. Leiva
Sayak Mukherjee
Hilary T. Nguyen
Michael C. Odokara-Okigbo
Bishnu K. Panigrahi
Monte Reed
Abella K. Rutahindurwa
Deep Shah
Giulia Siccardo
Richard T. Stephenson
Mary E. Tate
Alexander O. Tejeda
Chinedu C. Udeh
Max D. Yoeli
Sebastian S. Prieto La Noire
SA Class Representative - 2011, Jinhee K. Oh
SA Class Representative - 2013, All candidates won

I don't know why this information was delayed so many hours after voting ended...there's no paper trail to double-check, as all voting was completed online by DND authorized voters.

Monday, April 19, 2010


I don't think I've met a single Dartmouth student who won't take a little pleasure in reading that one of the NH state liquor commissioners was arrested for driving while intoxicated.

Remember, we have a drinking age of 21 because before then a young man or woman lacks the judgement to handle alcohol in a civilized society.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

UPDATE: SA Candidates on Diversity

A questionnaire posed to Student Assembly candidates from the Inter-Community Council is making the rounds on Blitz. Elections are tomorrow.

UPDATE: Link to full document here.

Some of the highlights:

Can you identify the under-represented communities at Dartmouth? Of those named, what are the issues facing two of these communities?

Elena Falloon: Many of the underrepresented communities are part of the ICC. In no particular order, these include the LGBTQ community, the women and gender studies community, the environmental sustainability community, the Hispanic Community, the Pan Asian Council, the NADs, the African American community, the socioeconomic community, the accessibility community, the international community and the multi-faith community.


They [international students] also face issues concerning financial aid that much of the campus doesn’t know about. For example, the financial aid plan of all students includes a portion that you are supposed to pay off through working on your leave term. But in some countries, it is impossible to make that amount because of the difference in value of currency. This is an issue that is largely ignored by the financial aid office even though it is an ongoing concern in the international community.

I have never met a person describing himself as a member of the accessibility or socioeconomic communities, but I imagine they have lively dinner parties. Disabilities did seem to be a common thread amongst all responses. I won't go into the currency argument as justification for favorable treatment toward international students; presumably most international students hail from Zimbabwe.

Brandon Aiono: There are so many underrepresented communities at Dartmouth that it would be hard to compile an exhaustive list, but these communities include: students of color from the Latino community to the black community, the Native American community, students from the Pacific Islands (fun fact: I’m Samoan!), students with disabilities, International students, students who are Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer or Curious, unaffiliated students, and so on…

I suspect underrepresented communities make up the majority of students using this system of measurement. Also, the poor Latinos have to be "of color" while the Native Americans get to break out on their own. Smacks of inherent bias.

3. What are acts of intolerance? Do you think SA has a responsibility to officially condemn said acts? What other policies or practices do you think SA can enact reactively and proactively in order to limit acts of intolerance?
Uthman Olagoke...Dartmouth needs to be an environment where everyone respects each other and their difference. So acts of intolerance are detrimental to my mission as SA President and I will not stand for it. I as SA President want to work with Parkhurst in creating a system that punishes and holds accountable organizations that willingly indulge in acts of intolerance.

That sounds fun.

Brandon Aiono: ...I would also like to say that I do not think it is enough for us to simply tolerate each other, we must also value the differences in experience and ideas that we each bring to Dartmouth and, by doing so, enrich our community.

You don't just have to peacefully coexist with all your neighbors, you have to be best friends with them. It gets better from there:

4. Compared to the number of minority students in the overall Dartmouth student body, only a small percent choose to affiliate with the Greek system. What are your thoughts?

Elena Falloon: I think few minority students choose to affiliate with the Greek system because it largely represents an antiquated, white, old boys club. Dartmouth’s student population is the most diverse it has ever been, but our Greek system has yet to adapt. Most houses are homogenous, and Greek organizations are known for celebrating their old traditions, even when they are offensive to other students. Greek organizations also tend to only interact with other Greek organizations in programming or social events. Some minority students might say to themselves, “These houses are not places where I feel invited to enter, so the idea of being a brother/sister is out of the question.”...
Falloon is herself a member of KDE sorority, of course.

The interview is 16 pages, so we'll work on getting a pdf uploaded so that you can peruse the rest. Would that I could imagine responses as funny as some you'll find inside.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Joe's Last Post? We Hope Not.

It was with no lack of dismay that I read Joe Asch's latest (and, it is said, last) post on Dartblog today:

After much reflection here in the quiet of our New Zealand valley, I have decided that in the future I will be devoting my time and energy to things other than Dartmouth College. To those of you who have spent time reading my posts on Dartblog over the past eight and a half months, thank you so much for your attention. I enjoyed writing my sincere perception of the truth for you.

To Joe, I can only say that those of us at the Review who have enjoyed following his incisive commentary and unparalleled reporting of trends and events at Dartmouth College will urge him to reconsider this pledge, given the results his campus involvement has yielded, not least of which was his prophetic clarion call for fiscal discipline at the College, long before that was a fashionable position to take.

Joe has been nothing but sincere since the beginning of his time as a Dartmouth gadfly, and like all who inhabit that role, he has earned the bitter vitriol of many of his fellow alumni. That vitriol became particularly pronounced during his campaign for the Board of Trustees. Given the sort of invective that was thrown at him - nonsensical, ugly, and deceitful epithets - it's not altogether surprising that he would want some time away from Dartmouth.

But, in view of the valuable role he's played for the last few years, and in view of his wholly unique institutional knowledge of Dartmouth (indeed, what other alumnus or alumna has audited 30+ classes?), we cannot help but hope that Asch will go back on this promise to curtail his involvement at Dartmouth. The College has had the benefit of a passionate watchdog for the past eight years; it would be a shame for Dartmouth to lose that watchdog altogether now.

Noli nothis permittere te terere, Joe.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

H-Po Changes Procedure

This just landed in Blitz inboxes all across campus from Acting Dean of the College Dr. Sylvia Spears, Ph.D

The Hanover Police Department has recently made a procedural change in its response to alcohol emergencies involving underage students in need of immediate medical attention.

Responding Hanover officers will continue to assist the Hanover Fire Department at the scene but will not issue the underage person a citation at that time. If the underage person qualifies according to department guidelines for diversion, the responding officer will leave a Hanover Alcohol Diversion Program brochure with them and follow this up with an email notification reminding them of their obligation to contact the diversion program coordinator within seven (7) days in order to enroll in the program. A future record check at Hanover Police Department would indicate that the person had been referred to diversion in lieu of prosecution. Any person failing to contact the diversion coordinator within the specified time period will be served a summons and referred to court.

I view this as a very positive procedural change that enhances our efforts toward harm reduction. This new change in procedure is not to be taken as a license to engage in the reckless and dangerous use of alcohol. It is imperative that we continue our efforts to reduce excessive consumption of alcohol on campus. The responsibility is now on our community to foster a positive social atmosphere that sets new norms around the safe consumption of alcohol.

The work of the Student and Presidential Alcohol Harm Reduction Committee (SPAHRC) is critical in the identification and implementation of best practices for the safe management of alcohol on campus. We will continue to work with Hanover Police and the Town to address common concerns regarding alcohol. Hanover Police have graciously agreed to suspend compliance checks at this time. However, the onus is on our community to show progress in reducing unsafe drinking at Dartmouth.

As I have said on many occasions, my worst fear is that I will have to call the family of a student and tell them that their son or daughter has died as a result of the excess consumption of alcohol. Every student on our campus must play an active role in addressing this urgent call to action.

Taking care of each other is a hallmark tradition of the Dartmouth student community and we are hopeful that this change will only strengthen that tradition.

Looks like you may be able to put down those pitchforks you took up during the time the alcohol stings came out.

UAAlbany's Brown Interviewing for Basketball HC

According to the Times Union, he's at least gotten permission to talk to us.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Jason Derulo: Programming Board Success

For those of you who might have missed the stunning success that was the Spring Concert this evening, some of the highlights:

Rather than prove that he has actually produced a song other than the massacre of Imogen Heap that is "Whatcha Say", Jason Derulo chose to demonstrate how truly poor his lip syncing skills are. The mob of 13 girls behind me managed to scream more of his lyrics then he himself did. In addition to this, his dancing skills were put to shame by those of his background dancers, a fact for which he tried to compensate by ripping off his clothes with as much frequency as possible. The only redeeming part of his performance, in fact, was that it finally put an end to the opening act, Telephoned (there is only so much sequin shaking one can take). Coming on the heels of last year's Three 6 Mafia success, it is clear the Programming Board is really hitting it home with their concert lineups.

The Review is Now On Twitter

I'm pleased to announce the launch of the Dartmouth Review's official Twitter account, located here. It will be automatically updated with posts from here at Dartlog and we'll be using it for additional stuff as well.

Ongoing: One of the Sillier Promotions I've Seen

Date:14 Apr 2010 09:56:52 -0400

Take the easiest test you will take at Dartmouth!
Quick, easy, painless, NO STUDYING and a FREE T-SHIRT!

-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

April 14th from 12 to 4pm
Collis Commonground
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

Get screened (via survey) to see if you're at risk for having contracted an STI
(Specifically HIV, chlamydia).

It's so easy, why not come? It's better to know and stay safe!
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

I can only imagine what the shirts say: "I got the clap and all I got was this free t-shirt!"

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Olympian Nolan Kasper '14 at Dartmouth

Yes, Nolan Kasper is a member of the Dartmouth class of 2014 and already on campus taking classes this spring. He's an olympic alpine skier who competed at the Vancouver Winter Games. When asked about opening and closing ceremonies, Kasper said, "it's pretty crazy walking into a building with 70,000 people screaming." Here's Nolan telling TDR his take on starting classes at Dartmouth:

Princeton Admits Inferiority

In today's Daily Princetonian, contributing columnist Kelsey Zimmerman laments Princeton's backward ways and points to Dartmouth as a shining example of, to handle college dining?

Okay, if you say so.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Upbeat Note of the Day, Courtesy of TED

It can't compete with the YoungCons' latest hit (their efforts continue to amaze), but this video from the lecture series TED chronicles the decline of violence across history, making a very convincing case for the steady improvement of human society - always a cheery thing to ponder.

TEDx, an independently organized lecture spinoff at Dartmouth, is being held on Saturday from 12-7 in Moore Theater at the Hop. It should be quite an event.

Visiting the Love March

After an illuminating interview with the Sun God (MALS student Johnathan James Recor), the masked presence that continues to believe the world (our campus in particular) is a stage for the dramatic reinterpretation of his own life, TDR reporter Brendon Mahoney '12 and I ventured to the much vaunted Love March at 6:30 on the Green, armed with the rather grainy photo capabilities of an iPhone.

We found about 20 people gathered around a table in the middle of the Green. The Sun God was busy mugging for the various cameras and chatting with babes (read: MALS students). About 8 students had been given red Superman capes, one of whom was also wearing his own set of rollerblades. Two S&S officers were standing by, but they seemed unsure as to why.

We got a few comments from the gathered students. One who was outfitted in the complimentary Superman cape and fake Ray Ban sunglasses told us he was "there for love, man. And you can quote me on that". Done and done, you beautiful human being.

The highlight for me was when two young ladies announced that today is the Sun God's birthday (HA! I told you they'd show up to my party, Father!) and encouraged our rather meager crowd to sing to him. Being the prepared Sun God that he is, Recor had his own applause track in the personal PA strapped to his belt, which he played while doing a few congratulatory karate moves.

Anyone who has any particular in this man's quest to combat the "War on Love" can check out my interview in our latest issue, soon to be online and distributed on campus. Johnathan, thank you for your time and energies. If this story has taught me anything it's that even the most biting sarcasm will leave you unscathed and blissfully unaware.

Also check out the relevant source material here & here.

Olympian Andrew Weibrecht on "bringing your best"

Here is Dartmouth student and olympic alpine skier Andrew Weibrecht '09 who told TDR about the importance of "bringing your best" to the winter games. For many Dartmouth students, spring is a chance to unwind on the green. But for Dartmouth olympians, spring is the only time of the year they are on campus to focus on their studies. The rest of the year is spent training for their moment to ski on the international level. 

Sun God Seizes The Green

We've tolerated his late night lightsaber sessions on the green, we've even dealt with his posters and flyers dominating message boards all over campus. But now, the Sun God has gone too far. On Yom Hashoa, the day of Holocaust remembrance, he has been preparing for his "Love March" by blasting music on the green in seeming disregard of the Hillel's Name Reading Ceremony, which was taking place on the porch of Collis. We can only hope that the 6:30 start of the Love March will not interfere with Hillel's 7:30 Memorial Service and Candle Lighting. Please, Sun God, refrain from marching around to high falutin' Euro synth-pop and allow Hillel an opportunity for commemoration and remembrance.

TDR Talks With Dartmouth Olympians

The latest issue of the Review, just out today, features an interview with Dartmouth's own undergraduate Olympians: Andrew Weibrecht '09, Laura Spector '10, Tommy Ford '12 and Nolan Kasper '14. Check out the full video here:

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Hated, Adored, Never Ignored; Young Cons At It Again

You all probably remember Josh "Stiltz" Riddle and David "Serious C" Rufful, known to most of America as The Young Cons, a rap duo who profess conservative beliefs. In addition to playing for the basketball team here in Hanover, the two are newly minted Review editors (Associate and Sports, respectively).

They've just released their newest video, "Health Care Nightmare," a rap about the loss of freedom that has come with Obamacare. Yes, the Reagan carboard cutout makes a return appearance as well. In the words of Joe Biden, "This is a big f----- deal!"

"It fits. It feels great."

Those words, just moments ago from 2010 Masters champion Phil Mickelson.

How great that a true family man and all-around class act was able to prevail in the most hallowed of American sporting events.

Having met Mickelson a number of years ago, I can personally speak to the quality of his character, which stands in direct opposition to that of golf's biggest star.

Bravo that in this case the good guy really did win.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Asch Defeated in Landslide

John Replogle '88 defeated Joe Ash '79 by a sweltering margin of 14,176 to 5,823, garnering more than 70 percent of the vote. The Association of Alumni results are similar. Had the numbers been the other way around, I'm sure we would already be hearing that excessive negative campaigning had confused alumni, that Stephen Smith's letterhead had hoodwinked Dartmouth graduates into voting for a racist misogynist, and that Asch was supported entirely by a shadowy cabal of '11 Review editors, Zionists, and the French tax clerk that he's secretly bank rolling as part of a sordid gay love triangle.

Luckily for the chattering folks at the Alumni Relations office and the pages of certain other objective publications, the Good Guys won. This day marks a victory for democracy and good governance.

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Kim Praises Alums, Condemns Philosophy Majors

In a recent video for the Washington Post, President Jim Yong Kim discussed the qualities necessary for leadership. He went on to take the opportunity to rag on the philosophy major; quoting his father, Kim said "You are not going to make it in this world if you study have to get a skill." President Kim went on to say that you can "smell" the qualities of great luminaries, citing his "privilege in being around fantastic leaders," namely Dartmouth alums Ed Haldeman, C.E.O. of Freddie Mac, and Jeff Immelt, C.E.O. of General Electric. He further discussed his experiences working with President Bill Clinton. Cheers to that self call, Mr. President.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Voting is Over

Voting for the Trustee and Association of Alumni Executive Committee has ended. 23% of "voting alumni" cast their votes online. The Vox the Vote site promises the results will "be posted shortly."

This could get interesting.

More Budget Transparency?

While I hesitate to laud the administration for its record of transparency since I matriculated in 2007, it seems that President Kim and his new team have been making a serious effort in that regard. The Strategic Budget Reduction and Investment website, in particular, would appear to call several of the SSWS claims into question.

As does of course basic economics.

The picture on Above the Fold is an extremely tight shot of the first of these events - while walking by it was obvious that no more than the event organizers and a few confused prospies were paying attention to the activism on hand.

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

SSWS to "Teach" Dartmouth About Fiscal Policy

Dartmouth Students Stand with Staff have announced a set of "Teach-In" sessions throughout the week, set to occur in various locations across campus. According to a blitz from Mary Stepick '10, the teach-ins, which are led by students and professors alike, are meant to "broaden the way we talk and think about budget cuts and layoffs and how they affect our lives and our communities." For a complete teach-in schedule, consult the group's calendar.

Monday, April 05, 2010


And just like that, Opening Day is upon us.

The talk this off-season has been all about the importance of defense and last night's Yankees-Sox game sure proved that, with a passed ball leading to the winning run.

Though this may be the dawn of another season, in the end the game remains the same - at least according to the eminent George Will.

Enjoy the season - after all, baseball is still America's pastime.